Love the Ones Who Drive You Crazy: Eight Truths for Pursuing Unity in your Church by Jamie Dunlop

We all know the familiar texts on the importance of brotherly love and unity in the church. But are we honest with ourselves about our commitment to this? Especially unity with ‘those people’ – the ones who, whether by personality or personal conduct, actually wind us up. We may not show it, we may do our utmost to be friendly, but do we actually love them?

Working through various Scripture passages from Romans 12-15, this book strives to get to the heart of what genuine brotherly love looks like in a truly united church. Jamie Dunlop contends that disagreements in a church, particularly over non-doctrinal matters, are opportunities to demonstrate that Christ is our central pillar of unity rather than friendships around things that we find comfortable. Not that these are easy opportunities, as Dunlop writes ‘easy love rarely shows off gospel power’ (pg 6). But, he says, ‘Christ is better than comfort’ (pg 48), by which he means that to have friendships centred around Christ is infinitely more healthy in the church than to have friendships centred around things we find ‘comfortable’. He continues, ‘real joy in the Christian life comes when we love in ways that are only possible because of the Spirit, and comfortable love rarely does that’ (pg 51).

The book begins with a helpful overview of why our churches should be united and then launches into eight challenges that must be overcome in pursuit of this end [all eight are listed with the book details – click on the image to view]. He counters each challenge, with a truth. For example, Challenge 2: How can I love ‘those’ people? is answered by Truth 2: Impossible love flows from impossible mercy. In answering this challenge Dunlop expounds the abundant love and mercy of God to each one of his people, and how by meditating on this, we will by his grace, show that love and mercy to others. But he also presses the point by highlighting that just ‘a show’ of love and mercy is not enough. This is a heart issue that must be dealt with.

Many times Dunlop seems able to ‘hit the nail on the head’ in his analysis of what can be the underlying difficulties with unity. He doesn’t sugarcoat the struggles that lie in our hearts towards our brethren, and he ably deals with most of the excuses we might bring to bear on the subject. His examples of the causes of disunity are very relevant and thought provoking, and his advice more often than not, will cause some soul searching.

But this is not a book that will leave you discouraged. On the contrary it paints a wonderful picture of true unity, and the joy and peace that will bring within the church. In his concluding chapter, Dunlop shows the hope we have in Christ alone. Indeed, it is only through faith in Christ’s mediatorial work, his mercy, his purposes and his plan for his people and his church that we can have hope in pursuing and finding unity. We must remember that only in unity will a church fully display the glory of God.

The book usefully finishes with an afterword briefly describing the right Biblical order and structure of the local church and mentions other books for further reading on this topic.

Highly recommended!

Lorna

Love the Ones Who Drive You Crazy, by Jamie Dunlop, published by Crossway (2023)