A recent publication on Marriage & Family was highly recommended by a reviewer in the Evangelical Times . I agree with the reviewer that it is a helpful book covering a range of topics affecting marriage and parenting. The author (a pastor of nearly 40 years) writes clearly about the Biblical standards of gender roles, marriage, child-rearing, discipline, catechizing and education, in a way which is refreshingly direct and down to earth.

As we approach the end of summer and what is traditionally ‘wedding season’, I thought it worth highlighting the section on singleness for all those who have attended weddings this summer but who have no immediate prospect of being a bride or groom themselves… the author talks about the importance of ‘Foundational Contentment’:

It is true that one can be happy as a single person. Christians can be content no matter their circumstances (Phil 4:11-13). Indeed it is vital that one enter marriage with a foundation of contentedness in Christ. Jesus is the Bread of Life who alone can satisfy the hunger and quench the thirst of the soul (John 6:35). If one thinks that one cannot be happy as a single person, or worse, that one’s happiness in life depends on marrying that person, one places a burden on marriage that it cannot bear. The expectation that any created thing, including marriage and a future spouse, are the key to happiness will lead inevitably to disillusionment and relational troubles. That expectation may even result in the dissolving of the marital bond in the quest to find that perfect match in which one will find the perfect bliss that one missed the first time around. Jesus says that if we wish to quench the thirst of our souls, we must come to him and drink (John 7:37, 38). The worst condition in which to enter marriage is as a weak, needy, clingy partner for one’s spouse demanding that he/she satisfy me, fulfill me, make me happy, and in the process suck the life out of him/her. Disappontment is inevitable. A destructive restlessness resides in those who lack a foundational contentment in Christ. It is vital that one marry fundamentally contented with singleness because one is already fundamentally fulfilled in Christ.

Lorna

Texts that Transform: Marriage & Family by Terry L Johnson, published by Banner of Truth